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1、IdevotedmyweekendstowatchingpositivepsychologyonPPvideotapedbyHarvardUniversity.Afterthat,Ikeptsayingtomyself:"ifonlyIhadknownitsexistenceearlier."Itpointedoutthewayouttomyproblem.Astimegoesby,Iintendtofocusonthedarksideofsocietyandnegativeaspectsoflife.Whe
2、nwe werekids,welookup,cheerup,andstandup; asgrown-ups,welookdown,feeldown,calmdown,andsitdown.IhopeIcanhappy,atleasthappier,andnotsomuchtodowithmycurrentsituation,verymuchtodowithmyperspectiveoflookingatthings.Thecoursepositivepsychologyprovidesmuchenlighte
3、nmentandinspiration tome,Iwritedownmyreflectionstoenable themtoactaconstantremainderofbeingstronger,beinghappier.Americanancestorsaresosmartthattheyput"thepursuitofhappiness"intheirDeclaration,becausehappinessindeedistheultimatecurrency,thesolegoalofourlife
4、.1Theveryessenceofeducationisnottoprovideinformation,butoffertransformationforstudents;2ABCtheory,respectivelystandingforaffect,behaviorandcognition.Affectisdeterminedbyyourcognitioninsteadofyourbehavior.3aboutrelationship 3components:1intimacy+2passion+3c
5、ommitmentIfyouhave123,luckily,marry himorher,youhaveagoodrelationship.Ifyouhave12,whichsuggeststhatyouhavealoverwithoutfuture.Ifyouhave13, whichmeansyouhave intimatefriends.Ifyouhave2,that'sloveatfirstsight.Ifyouhave23,thatisthemarriagebetweenWangXiaofei汪小菲
6、and大S.Waitandseehowlongtheirrelationshipcanlast.Ifonly3,thatiswhyparentskeeptogetherforthesakeofkids,money,positioninsteadoflove.Sixfactorsinarelationship:closeness,similarity, familiarity,competence,physicalattractiveness,gainorloss.Rememberthehighestcompl
7、imentpaidbyamantoawomanismarriageor"youmakemeabetterman"or"youmakemewanttobeabetterman".Whatmattersisnotwhetheryoucanfindagoodrelationship;itmatterswhetheryoucancultivateagoodone. Afterhoneymoonperiod,weshouldnotconstantlyaskwhatiswrongwithourrelationship;
8、weshouldnotaskhowtoimproveourrelationship.Weshouldconcentrateonwhatworksonus,whichisthetrend,whichcanworkwondersonus.Inmarriage,pleasebearinyourmind,neverfeelcontemptforeachother,neverbelittleeachother
