【8A版】初中英语笑话

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1、【MeiWei_81-优质适用文档】1.Oncetwohunterswenthuntingintheforest.Oneofthemsuddenlyfelldownbyaccident.Heshowedthewhitesofhiseyesandseemedtohaveceasedbreathing.Theotherhuntersoontookouthismobilephonetocalltheemergencycenterforhelp.Theoperatorsaidcalmly:"First,youshouldmakesurethatheisalreadydead."T

2、hentheoperatorheardagunshotfromtheotherendofthephoneandnextheheardthehunterasking:"WhatshouldIdonext?"两个猎人进森林里打猎，其中一个猎人不慎跌倒，两眼翻白，似已停止呼吸。另一个猎人赶紧拿出手机拨通紧急求助电话。接线员沉着地说：“第一步，要先确定你的朋友已经死亡。”于是，接线员在电话里听到一声枪响，然后听到那猎人接着问：“第二步怎办？”2.LetmetakeitdownAnelephantsaidtoamouse,"nodoubtthatyouarethesmallestz

3、ndmostuselessthingthatIhaveeverseen.""Pless,sayitagain.Letmetakeitdown."themousesaid."IwilltellafleawhatIknow."为我所用一头大象对一只小老鼠说：“你无疑是我见过的最小、最没用的东西。”“请再说一遍，让我把它记下来。”老鼠说。“我要讲给我认识的一只跳蚤听。3.WateringFlowerInRainTom:Whydoyouhavethatwateringcan?Dan:I'mgoingtowatertheflowers.Tom:Butit'draining.Dan:

4、That'sOK.I'mwear-ingmyraincoat.雨天浇花汤姆：你拿喷壶做什么？丹：我要去浇花。汤姆：可是，在下雨呀！丹：没关系，我穿着雨衣呢！4.TwobirlsTeacher:Herearetwobirds,oneisaswallow,theotherissparrow.Nowwhocantelluswhichiswhich?Student:IcannotpointoutbutIknowtheanswer.Teacher:Pleasetellus.Student:Theswallowisbesidethesparrowandthesparrowisbesi

5、detheswallow.两只鸟老师：这儿有两只鸟，一只是麻雀。谁能指出哪只是燕子，哪只是麻雀吗？学生：我指不出，但我知道答案。老师：请说说看。学生：燕子旁边的就是麻雀，麻雀旁边的就是燕子。5、heFishNet"Canyoutellmewhatfishnetismade,Ann?""Alotoflittleholestiedtogetherwithstrings."repliedthelittlegirl.鱼网"你能告诉我鱼网是什么做的吗，安？"老师发问道。【MeiWei_81-优质适用文档】【MeiWei_81-优质适用文档】"把许多小孔用绳子栓在一起就成了鱼网了。"

6、小女孩回答道。6、TheNewTeacherGeorgecomesfromschoolonthefirstofSeptember."George,howdidyoulikeyournewteacher?"askedhismother."Ididn'tlikeher,Mother,becauseshesaidthatthreeandthreeweresixandthenshesaidthattwoandfourweresixtoo....."新老师9月1日，乔治放学回到家里。"乔治，你喜欢你们的新老师吗？"妈妈问。"妈妈，我不喜欢，因为她说3加3得6,可后来又说2加4也得

7、6。"7、AphysicsExaminationOnceinaphysicsexamination,Nickfinishedthefirstquestionverysoon,whilehisclassmateswerethinkingithard.Thequestionwas:Whenitthunderswhydoweseethelightingfirst,thenhearthethunderrolls?Nick'sanswer:Becauseoureyesarebeforeears.一次物理考试在一次物理考试时，当同学们都