theobligationsandresponsibilitiestomarriage婚姻的义务与责任

theobligationsandresponsibilitiestomarriage婚姻的义务与责任

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时间:2018-04-08

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1、TheObligationsandResponsibilitiestoMarriageIhadgivenatalkonfamilychangeonenight.AtdinnerafterwardsIwassubjectedtoahostilequizzingbyagroupofwomenintheirthirtieswhoclaimedthatmywholeanalysisignoredthemostbasicchangeofall.Theytookoffensetomystatementthatafamilyconsistsofahusband,awifeandchi

2、ldren,theysaid.They,asagroupofsinglewomen,werebestfriends,supportedoneanother,anddefinedoneanotheras"family".Marriageandhavingkidswerenowirrelevant,andintheiropinion,thatwasthemostbasicsocialchange.Lookingbackonit,Ifindtheywereright,butthisrisingtideofchangeisitselftheproblem.Familyis,if

3、anything,thelinkbetweengenerations,thecenterofchildrearingandculturaltransmission.It'snotjusta"bigstadium"whereeveryonecanenjoytheshow.Bothmarriageandfamilyinvolvelong-termobligationsandresponsibilityforsharedcare,notjustthesearchofhappiness,thathollowgoalofthemodernage.Itseemsthatloveha

4、sgotoutofhand.Themodernnuclearfamilywasrootedinthedesiretolivehappilyinamoreequalmarriage,wheretheraisingofchildrenandtheinvestmentofbothparentsinthechildren'sliveswereguaranteedbybondsoffriendshipbetweentheparents,whichwerebasedonrationallove.Thereisanaturaltendencyforanyrelationshipbas

5、edonvoluntaryaffectiontocomeapart,butmarriageprovidestheglueneededtokeepacoupletogetherbyprovidingtiesoffamily,inconjunctionwiththeobligationsofparentstochildren.WhatpeoplecallthenewLoveFamily,unfortunately,hasreplacedapermanentrelationshipwithanewidealofunlimitedchoice.Wecannownotonlych

6、ooseourmarriagepartner,wealsocandivorcethatpartneratwill,subjectchildrentoourownadultworshipofhappiness,anddenytheotherparentanyregularcontactwiththeirchildren.Wecaneven,ifwewant,interprettheterm"family"toincludepeoplewhoarenotrelatedtouseitherbybloodormarriage—asetofclosefriendswhosuppo

7、rtoneanother,likethewomenImentionedabove.Throwinthefaithfuldogifyoulike.Familyiswhateverwewantittobe.Thetroubleis,suchanelasticclassificationignorestheproblemofchildrenandthewiderproblemofcaringforothers.Ifmarriageexistsonlyasaromanticrelationshipthatcanbeendedatwill,andf

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